True Love Forever
by Vikay
Summary: How did Nymphadora Tonks and Remus Lupin get together after their fight in the hospital wing? And what happened afterwards? [Re-upload/ Translated from german/ Chapter 2 of 44 uploaded / On hiatus]
1. Hopeless?

_**A/N:** This is actually the very first multi-chapter fanfiction I've written, but as the original fanfiction is in german, I've thought about translating it into english (already started doing this a while ago but deleted it again after publishing the first few chapters 'cause I didn't have time at this moment)._

 _As german is my native language, grammar and spelling mistakes are just natural, but please tell me when you spot any mistakes so I can correct them and improve my english skills (:_

 _Otherwise, I hope you enjoy reading this. I'll try updating this story each Thursday._

I rushed out of the hospital wing, down the stairs, my own footsteps echoing from the empty corridor. No one else was there, the castle seemed deserted and a cold silence had settled down.

But I could and would not pay any attention to my surroundings. My thoughts went head over heels without regard for me or my twisted feelings.  
Why did Remus Lupin do this? Why did he let me suffer? He did not want to be with me because he was too dangerous as a werewolf. But did he not recognize how much he hurts me with this? How much it harms me? I did not get it. Maybe I was too blind, too stupid to understand it.

No, _he_ did not understand it.

He understood absolutely nothing.

How I felt or whatever was wrong with me, apparently he did not care. This "I'm too old, too poor and too dangerous" - stuff was probably just a pretense to hide that he did not give a damn about me. I was nothing for him, but he was not even able to be angry at nothing. For he was Remus Lupin and he was too kind and too endearing to hurt anyone intentionally.

Or he was just a coward.

The grief and the pain disappeared and now anger piled up inside of me. I had a strong feeling of screaming, letting my anger run wild, but I could not. My emotions suffocated it. Constricted my heart...

I had arrived outside. It had started to rain. I immediately pulled the cloak tighter around my body.

I loved and hated rain. It could be romantic and lovely and just beautiful, but sometimes it also expressed grief and loneliness, and occasionally furious anger. At the end the rain reflected what we felt.

I did not know what the rain was reflecting right now. It might be a mixture of everything.

I used the drops of rain which dampened my face to let my tears run free. It seemed to me as if all the pain sweeped away with them ... Or maybe I only wanted to feel this, so I would feel nothing? Just forgetting all the emotions and go on without them. How liberating this would be.

Suddenly I heard a voice behind me that immediately made me stand still.

"Tonks, please wait!"

It was Remus' voice. Instantly I went on. I did not want to talk with him. But at the same time there was nothing I ever wanted more than this.

"Nymphadora, please!"

I could not help it, this name made me turn around. I snapped at him: "Don't call me _that_! Never!"

He stopped, surprised and taken aback, but quickly regained his composure.

"Please wait! I need to talk with you."

I wanted to go, but I could not. This pleading tone in his voice did not let me.

Remus almost caught me. Finally I had the power to move again, but he held on to my hand.

"Let me go", I shouted and after a few seconds I managed to pull away and continued my way, but I heard his footsteps following me at once.

"Please, let us talk."

"Oh, now you wanna talk?" I had already arrived at the gate and could have disapparated, but I stopped and looked at Remus. "You never wanted to talk. Holed up at you werewolves. I didn't hear one single word from you and you didn't even manage to greet me earlier."

He looked at me and said nothing. After a while he came closer. I did not move, continued watching into his eyes and waited for a response. Then, without a warning, he leaned towards my face and kissed me. His lips were warm, and wet from the rain. I took a moment before I actually perceived the kiss. All my senses were as befuddled. Then, when I tried to deepen it, Remus broke it and looked at me.

He looked at me for quite a while – standing in the rain – until he said: "Nymphadora Tonks, I love you."

The words passed his lips so quietly and so gently that I nearly did not understand it.

"And then why did you hurt me the whole time?", I asked after a while. "Why did you never want us to get together? Everything just because you're a werewolf?"

"You … you don't understand this. I know how you feel as an outcast and you'd have to experience the same if we were together. And I can't offer you anything either. Furthermore I'm too dangerous. I could kill you, could turn you into a werewolf as well. I'd ruin your entire life. Or take it."

"I've already told you at least a thousand times that I don't care." My voice was very calm, there was no trace of the anger I had felt a few minutes ago. "I don't care that you don't have that much money. I don't care that you turn into a monster once a month. And I also don't care what people think of me as long as I can be happy with you."

"I know", Remus said. "That's why I'm here. I've realized that it doesn't work this way, and that you can well decide on your own. Also I don't want to continue hurting you. And I can't manage to live without you anymore."

I had to smile. "Okay, as this is clear now, how about another kiss?"

Now Remus had to smile too, took my face into his warm hands and kissed me.


	2. Happy

It seemed like an eternity before Remus released the kiss.

We looked at each other. No smile could be seen in his eyes, and yet I felt his relief.

I heard voices coming from the castle.

"I thinks we should go", I said to Remus quietly.

He just nodded and with an unspoken understanding we apparated to my home.

Here, near London, the weather was not better either. Dark clouds hung heavy in the sky, leaving the world looking gloomy, dreary and concentrated as if there would be no way out of this storm.

The house, which was located in a normal Muggle-suburb, was given to me by by my parents back then. Actually, it belonged to an aunt of my father, but she did not live here any longer, and when I had decided to move out, my dad had offered it to me – something my mother did not really like.

I had painted it myself, which is why it immediately stood out in this gray area with its bright yellow and pink shutters.

Remus was not here for the first time, but I hoped that this visit would end better than the last one …

I unlocked the door and went inside, Remus right behind me. As strange as it sounded, I did not want to take his hand. He should follow me voluntarily.

We went into the living room that was – although quite small – really comfortable, which was mainly due to the huge amount of pillows on the couch as well as the large fireplace. A clock ticked and told us that it was half past eight.

In the middle of the room was a small table on which everything possible was lying around. Reports, parchments, feathers and a lot of handkerchiefs … I was not very neat anyway, but the whole I have spent alone, I had not even thought about cleaning up anything.

I lit a fire in the fireplace.

"You wanna drink something?", I asked Remus. "I've got tea, cacao..."

"How about a glass of wine?"

"But only one glass", I said winking and went to the kitchen.

The first thing I did in my humble kitchen was to take a deep breath again. Suddenly everything went so fast. Remus had confessed his love, we kissed … and now we were here together, in my house.

I did not know what to expect from tonight. Would we talk? Or do more? To be honest, I had nothing against a nice conversation with Remus; that was something I had really missed all these months. But at the same time I would like to pull him into bed immediately. At this thought I had to smile. I had no idea how much experience Remus had. He was much older than me, and yet none of the stories he and Sirius had told me ever mentioned if Remus had been into an actual relationship before.

I tried to free my head from all these thoughts. I would find out soon enough where this evening was leading.

But when I opened the bottle of wine and fetched two glasses, a new thought conquered my head: What if Remus was only here because he was so depressed due to Dumbledore's death? And tomorrow he would be gone again as if nothing had happened?

I closed my eyes for a moment and took another deep breath.

Without wasting a second thought on it, I went back into the living room.

Remus was standing next to my bookshelf and seemed to look at each and every book.

He immediately noticed me when I came in and turned around.

"I didn't know you read that much." He pointed at the shelf.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I've always loved books and most of them were already here when I moved in. These are mostly muggle-books."

Remus smiled slightly and sat down again. I did the same, with the glasses in my hands. I handed Remus one.

"And what do we toast to?", Remus asked smiling. "That we are together?"

"No. To Dumbledore", I said gently and immediately saw how Remus' smile vanished.

"To Dumbledore", he said lightly and we clinked out glasses.

Then we sat in silence for several minutes. It was neither an embarrassing nor annoying silence, but I still broke it: "You wanna talk about it?"

Remus looked at me and seemed to know immediately that I was talking about Dumbledore. He shook his head.

I wanted to try asking him if he was only here because of Dumbledore's death, but I could not. Remus, however, seemed to have read my mind.

"Tonks, I hope you know that I'm here on my own will", he said gently and smiled again.

"I know", I said without knowing if I really did. "It's just … you've changed your mind so quickly and everything … maybe I need a bit to realize all of this."

Remus laughed. "You always wanted us to get together. And now it's too fast?"

"No, it's just … so suddenly. But don't get your hopes up. I'm gonna get used to it." I laughed and pinched his arm. Then I looked at him and said lightly, still a smile on my lips: "I love you, Remus Lupin."

Then I kissed him and he immediately kissed back. My whole body felt electrified, and everything I wanted was to have Remus as close as possible. He seemed to have the same feeling, because he pulled me closer to him, so that not even a leaf would have fit between our bodies.

At this moment I interrupted the kiss, heavily breathing. Remus looked at me questioningly. I said with a quiet voice: "One question … Are we gonna have sex tonight? 'Cause if yes, I think the bed in my room would be way more comfortable than the couch."

Remus had to laugh, but then he caressed over my face with his warm hand and said: "Then let#s go to your room."

The next morning I was waken by the warm sun on my face. It took a moment until I remembered everything that happened last night, but when I did, I noticeably felt a grin on my face.

I glanced sideways to see if Remus was already awake and noticed that the bed was empty.

No, please not. Please let it not be true. Did Remus really bugger off? I wish this would not be my first thought, but it was, and the smile immediately disappeared from my face.

Suddenly I heard a voice behind me: "Hey sleepyhead. Finally awake?"

I turned around and looked into the eyes of Remus. So he was still here. A smile began to spread on my face. I got up, went up to him and engaged him in a long kiss.

But Remus interrupted it and said: "Maybe you should have breakfast first?"

He grinned. Suddenly I realized that I was extremely hungry.

"Not a bad idea", I replied and grinned at him. Remus took my hand and together we went to the kitchen. He had already set the table, even a bunch of flowers stood there. I felt like I was still dreaming.

While we were eating no one said a word, but we looked at each other the whole time and never in my life I would have thought that the alone could be that satisfying.

"Do you now regret that you've rejected me the whole time?", I asked unexpectedly, but curious about the answer.

Remus ate a large piece of toast and took his time with chewing. Then he replied: "I think so … though I didn't change my views but I think if you're ready to be with a werewolf, you'll know-"

He got no further, because I had already given him a warm hug.


End file.
